I am stuck in a circle of flight and freeze.

My exhaustion is valid. My energy is being spent in this circle. I need to readjust my nervous system.

I have a lot of trauma to work through, and some vicarious trauma to take care of as well.

It’s going to be a journey, and I know it’s not going to be easy.

Am I hesitant? Fuck yes. Facing things I have been compartmentalizing is not going to be fun. I have a lot of boxes to unpack. Le sigh.

I am super thankful for a great therapist who lets me unload and helps me navigate my feelings.

I have a lot of feelings, lol.

I didn’t realize how much I was keeping in boxes until I started spewing everything out.

No wonder I am so tired.

I gave myself permission over the holidays to spend time doing absolutely nothing. I have spent some time in bed watching Netflix, and watched the whole Harry Potter series in PJs. Also, Toblerone for breakfast – *chef’s kiss*

I am going to share as much as I can, at least what I am comfortable sharing.

Be patient with me, cause it’s gonna be intense at times.

Roller coaster, here I come!