Why Not “Letting it Go” Is Okay

Me….not letting go.

[This post was inspired by a friend of mine.]

I hear it all the time.  Goddammit I say it.  I say it knowing what is really going to happen in my head:  “Let it go.”

Well, what if you CAN’T let it go?

I bring this point of view from the ‘mental illness of me’ perspective:

  • Depression and anxiety are voices
  • Those voices whisper
  • Those voices WON’T let it go

When the switch is flipped, it won’t turn off.  I can’t just let something go.  My brain will relive the words/a situation over and over, especially if it’s bad.  That shit feeds my brain like candy.

Out of the blue I will relive a moment that is not memorable to anyone, but because I may  have said something that wasn’t necessarily good (in my brain), the movie of that moment plays out, and is unfortunately memorable TO ME.  Not in a good way

This tends to happen right before I go to bed.  FUN.

Although, I gotta say that I really enjoy it when it happens at work.  Then I feel totally stoooopid.  Makes for a great day of supreme self doubt.  EXTREME SARCASM FONT.

My brain will release the vice grip every now and then and in that brief moment I can “let it go”.

In reality, my brain is really going through the hit list of Amy’s Awkward Moments.  It resets my top 5 every week, choosing various memories from my early childhood, to something that happened yesterday.  I know this and have fully accepted the rotating hit list.

So, if we could all try and use “let it go” a little less (unless you’re Elsa, and singing in a frozen castle), and try super awesome distraction methods instead, I think we could all avoid some pent up hostility.



Thanks 🙂



3 thoughts on “Why Not “Letting it Go” Is Okay

  1. I do this a bit too, especially if I do or say something embarrassing. I’ve noticed that if I tell someone about it – my husband or my sister, for example, that somehow it’s much easier to forget about it. It’s like I just need to get it off my chest. Weird, eh?

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